At any time, Life offers us an opportunity to open our consciousness and broaden our vision, allowing us to grow. Let me tell you about my experience this morning.
Several weeks ago, a person had contacted me by email and wrote: "Marushka, I feel lost, I need you to help me find myself". After various exchanges of messages, this gentleman ended up taking an appointment for a 4-hour session in nature, during which I intended to transmit shamanic techniques to allowing him to find himself while acquiring more autonomy. We agreed on a date, a schedule and a place to meet. This morning, therefore, I went to the appointment, constantly repeating to my assistant: "This man is not ready. He would consciously find himself back, but he still hesitates. He won't come". We waited half an hour and he didn't come. Back home, I turn on my computer and check my mailbox. I discover a message that had been sent to me at 10:03: "Marushka, I will be there in 30 minutes". However, we had an appointment at 9:45. I replied to this person and received a second message: "I can’t find our meeting place". I answered a second time before closing my mailbox for the day. This short adventure illustrates perfectly the inner state that this gentleman lives in and of which he is aware as he admits to being lost. The next step would be to observe how the fact of being lost affects his daily life. In today example, this man goes to an appointment without having previously inquired about the situation of the place where he was to go. So he misses his appointment and I imagine that his daily life is currently punctuated by various other missed acts. When we experience the feeling of being lost, this perdition manifests on the outside and nothing seems to work in our life. We are no longer connected to our inner compass and we are exhausted in trying to concretely manifest objectives that are not based on any of our internal foundations. Observing allows us to take note of what is happening and offers us the opportunity for real change. There’s nothing to look for, because it’s already there. When we are in search of a purpose, we focus on it and make ourselves unavailable for all the other daily teachings. To find oneself, to find oneself back, begins already by observing oneself.
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When we are in relationship with one person, we are not two, we are three. Us, the Other and the relationship. I conscientiously choose to remain very down-to-earth in this post and therefore intentionally ignore the ancestral lineages and the fact that we are all entangled and intertwined.
A person asked me this morning about a situation that he is experiencing: "Marushka, if I ask Heaven to support me in my desire to go into such a relationship, would that I mean that I manipulate the Other?" Here is my answer: "I invite you not to ask Heaven to make you go into such a relationship, I invite you instead to ask Heaven and Earth - as we are incarnated - that they support you in your desire AND your need to manifest Love in you and for you, because you know that you only by able to love the Other if you love yourself first. It is therefore here not a question of manipulating the Other or the relationship, but indeed of guiding the Other towards Love of himself through the experience of the relationship. Guiding is not manipulation. If you guide, you invite the Other and he is free to follow you… or not. If you manipulate, you force the Other, you submit him and he has no choice but to do what you order. Manipulating requires a considerable amount of energy from the manipulator to manifest what he desires and which is sometimes very far from what he needs, while guidance is done naturally, being himself and therefore without having to do anything special." A lighthouse radiates its light and allows boats not to get lost or run aground. The captain of the ship is free to look for that light and take it into account, just as he is free to turn away from it. The lighthouse does not worry about the captain’s choice, it is not responsible for the fate of the boat, its sole responsibility is to radiate its light. Some anthropologists argue that original shamans were women, long before men were initiated. This may be explained by the fact that a woman, because of her sensitivity, has a more intuitive perception, less rationalized than a man. In some tribes, however, and all over the world, women no longer have the right to express their true power. The mystery the woman embodies still and always seems to frighten the ancient man. And this is still happening in 2021, in the West.
The mental is never far away, nourished by hidden emotions not yet known and/or recognized. It is therefore essential to express these emotions so that the energy of Life can again flow freely within us and around us. The old behaviours are still often, and very unconsciously, repeated by both women and men. Women still tend to submit or vice versa to submit the man while he is divided between understanding the woman and submitting her, as he has done for millennia. When will we finally integrate, beyond the fine discourses derived from the theories of the mental, that women and men are perfectly complementary, that the competences of both have the same value? When will we finally walk, work together, one with the other and not one against the other, animated by our respective fears? When will we finally understand that duality, that our differences are an engine and not an obstacle? Let us look around us and especially in ourselves. Let us see with the eyes of the soul and perceive the veils of our own illusions. We are all human, we are all on the way and above all, let us see what is, without judgment or expectation in order to continue to trance-form ourselves so that, when the time comes, transmutation, alchemy operates in us... According to Traditional Chinese Medicine, Fear is the Mother of all emotions, that is to say that we enter into reaction to an external event because a fear has been, even very unconsciously, felt.
Fear is therefore an engine since it makes us react. BUT... if we react, we are no longer the active actor of our life and we then become a passive spectator or a sheep. Fear takes us in, blinds us and tossed by it, we let ourselves be guided by any shepherd. Fear, Mother of all emotions, will express itself in different ways according to the dominant energy that each unconsciously carries in him. Some will express anger and if anger swells without being controlled, it will become hatred. Others will express sadness and if the sadness swells without being controlled, it will become melancholy. Still others will express joy and if the joy swells without being controlled, it will become hysteria. The latter will finally express indifference and the belief that they feel no emotion, those are the ones who are afraid of being afraid and who choose to disembowel themselves by imagining that they will not suffer. These are the ones whose mind is in control and they then experience the painful experience of obsessive thoughts. "It’s a done deal! Today, I offer myself a loving life respectful of my basic needs in terms of love and emotional security, but also material."
Who has never taken such a resolution? Who has never vowed this promise? Then an external element manifests itself and we fall back into our old behaviors while the commitment to ourselves falls into the oblivion of our inner fortress. I remember an umpteenth argument with an ex-companion, after which I had made the umpteenth decision to be totally devoted to listening to my basic needs. The guy came to apologize, once again. My first instinct was to answer him, but I choose this time to curb my impulsivity and rather than react, I paused and looked with curiosity at what was happening in me. The strong emotion of anger roared and not wanting to let it direct my life, I had to manage it differently than by going up into the towers. I then remembered a friend who had once proposed me: "And if you welcomed emotion without judging it?" This is what I did that day and I discovered that beyond anger, I was living in my depth an extraordinary adventure. Since that day, I have often tried – and almost as often forgot – to act rather than react. The line between the two can sometimes seem thin and subtle, but if we take the time to sit down and observe what is happening in us, we then become more actor of our existence and we gradually stop suffering what is no longer suitable for us. The more we hurry, the more we lose ourselves. You have probably already read or heard the story that I transcribe below:
A man prays: - "Lord, make me rich." Every day, the man prays and utters the same words. Every day, when he goes home at night, he finds that his situation remains unchanged. One morning, he felt anger in him and expressed it to God: - "Lord, it's enough! I pray every day and You... You do not even answer the prayer of one of your faithful!" As man takes his breath again, he hears the voice of God answering him: - "Have you even thought about buying a lottery ticket?" I read everywhere - and for several years - that thought is creative. Some even advocate that it is enough to think, to imagine, to dream or to visualize something and this thing become reality. So many sit on their couch or to meditate... to a better world for example! However, I would like to remind you that we live in a reality that is made up of matter and that, therefore, if you want something concrete to manifest itself, you will have to do the right things. I give you a few examples: if you want to have a child, you’ll have to have sex; if you want to be thin and healthy, you’ll have to feed yourself differently; if you want to paint a painting, you’ll have to buy some canvas, brushes and paint; if you want the planet to be less polluted, you will have to consume otherwise; if you want the wealth to be better shared, you will have to stop feeding the current system of society; etc., etc. So yes, thought is the origin of everything, but if that thought is not followed by concrete and right actions, my opinion is that your reality won't change. Do you know what I mean? Many of us often aspire to experience something different/otherwise. Who has never dreamed of an idyllic vacation when he/she was stuck in the office? Who has never dreamed of staying in a vast residence rather than in his/her two rooms? Who has never thought to meet the one with whom he/she would share a love story more wonderful than those narrated in fairy tales?
But does dreaming to the point of fleeing the reality of everyday life really make us happier? Could dreaming too much have an impact on our mental and physical health? I read everywhere that it is important to dream, to pursue one’s dream, or even to cling to it at any cost. I think this is true, but only in part, because a dream too far from reality, an unrealistic dream, an utopia, brings - in my opinion - no satisfaction in the long term. What if instead of dreaming of the impossible, we begin to become aware of what we have? What if we go further and begin to fully appreciate what we have? By acknowledging all that we already have (health, housing, work, family, friends, etc.) and expressing our gratitude in this regard, we observe that we are in a position of openness that allows us to welcome even more. What if you’re already living your dream? From as far back as I can remember, I think I’ve always had my brain boiling, the thoughts colliding continuously, one question leading to another, one idea leading to a myriad of others. I was told that I had a creative mind, but what is creativity worth if it is not expressed? I had lots of great ideas all over the place, I was always procrastinating and nothing really satisfying was taking shape in my reality.
Several years ago, when I was at the bottom of my bed with my eyes wide open, hostage to yet another insomnia, a new enlightenment had crossed my little head and I had heard myself whisper: «a thought, an act». Had I finally found THE solution? Probably relieved, I remember that I had immediately fallen asleep. The next morning, I woke up with a smile on my face and a light heart. Not too proud of me, I sat at the breakfast table and said to the present friend: – From now, as soon as I have a thought, I will make an act to realize it! He shrugged his shoulders and said: – Poor thing, you won’t have enough of a day to realize all the thoughts that are rushing. Do you even know how many we produce per minute? I was sweeping with my hand his coming explanation: – I am convinced that by putting into action any thought that comes to me and by focusing all my attention on the act in question, rather than producing more thoughts, they will calm themselves. We live an incarnation experience that requires us to fully inhabit this matter and to fully inhabit it, it seems essential to me to go beyond theories and other concepts and go further in order to concretize them. For having put into practice the inspiration that came to me that night and for having made it since a habit, I can assure you that when a thought is followed by an act, we then become complete and it is only by being whole that we can feel inner peace, that which manifests itself when we cease to be torn between the idea and its realization. We are constantly subjected to changes and whether they are chosen or undergone, they systematically cause stress in our different energy bodies (spiritual, emotional, mental and physical). Most of the time, we are not aware of the stress engendered, because our body - in the global sense of the term - has the intelligence to self-regulate to regain balance without us having to intervene in consciousness in the natural course of its adaptation.
The way we look at life and all the situations that come our way is decisive when it comes to the consequences of stress. This view is not only the result of what animates us in our deepest depths, it is also shaped by the society in which we evolve as well as by the education received from the very early childhood. The Soul does not act alone, it uses the Ego to experience the worlds (I specify the worlds as the Ego also exists outside the manifested reality). For some, for example, it is positively stressful to go to work even though they will have to attend a meeting, while for others, it will be a real ordeal. For some, it is positively stressful to take their over-excited kids on holidays on a crowded and noisy beach while for others, it will rather be perceived as an insurmountable chore. In short, if we consider the changes positive, stress energizes us and allows us to act. If we perceive the changes as negative, stress can slow us down, sometimes even paralyzing us. And if we insist, it will be burn-out or illness. As our gaze on life in general and on ours in particular determines whether stress will be constructive or destructive for us, it seems to me wise to become aware of this famous gaze, an inner gaze that determines - very unconsciously - our actions, but also and above all our reactions. A first awareness can be obtained through mental analysis and reflection. However, my own experience has shown me the limits of this method as the mind itself is only the result of conditioning stored from conception (and beyond). Moreover, while the analysis allows understanding - although it remains totally subjective - it is often confined to the intellectual level. This is certainly necessary, but not enough to generate a paradigm shift and what is happening in us. Another method is then to relax, to put the mind to rest, to disconnect it. Many people who discover active relaxation techniques often fall asleep at the beginning of their practice. This is due either to the cumulative tiredness of the organism or to an unconscious need of the mind to short-circuit any attempt to bring it to term change. As the practice progresses, through gentle and benevolent repetitions towards oneself, the person will be able to remain in a state of semi-awakening. It is then that real understanding, often in symbolic form, will naturally rise from the subconscious to the consciousness. The change will then begin to take place. |
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